SPEAKER_01 0:16

Hello and welcome back to Empower Your Menopause for episode four. We've got your fabulous Beyond 40 coaching team here is Coach James and Coach Julie. And welcome back. Thanks for joining us. Today we've got a really juicy topic, something that a lot of our clients talk to us about, and that is cravings. If you're somebody who struggles with cravings, then this episode is definitely for you. One of the things that I think women find is especially as we enter the paramenopause and menopause years, cravings can seem to change and maybe become stronger because a lot of the changes that are happening in our bodies.

SPEAKER_00 1:11

Sure. Well, I mean, you know, I say that to myself on a regular basis. So you don't have to be in menopause or the menopause transition to have cravings. I think the first thing that I'd say in all seriousness is, you know, let's normalize this to a point of view. Having cravings is quite often a physiological response to some kind of hormone imbalance. You know, the classic one is uh the young woman who's pregnant and she's calling her partner at whatever time it may be to get her pickles, or you know, like McDonald's cheeseburger when she's never eaten one, or whatever it may be. That is a result of those hormonal changes, and we know that hormonal changes occur during the menopause transition, obviously. You know, perimenopause estrogens are up and then it's down, and then it's up and then it's down. There's a steady decline in it all, there's a steady decline in progesterone all the way through. So that of itself can uh lead to an increase in cravings, particularly, I feel for sweet things is what I tend to see more often than not in clinic. Savory sometimes, but more often than not, not sweet things. The other thing, as well, that happens is that when those that estrogen fluctuation starts to take take place, is that blood sugar balance becomes challenged as well. And what happens when blood sugar balance becomes becomes challenged, we tend to crave stuff that is usually not good for us. You know, our our our bodies get used to this idea of sort of like blood sugar being up, then down rapidly, then up, then down rapidly, because oestrogen mediates that that effect somewhat of blood sugar and the effect that that might have on appetite, then that can also change during um menopause. I think we have to factor in as well the fact that we're talking about women who've reached a certain age, and quite often there can be inherent challenges and behaviors that have developed over the over the years that that come with this. And then finally, nutritional deficiencies tend to be more pronounced during the menopause transition as well, and those nutritional deficiencies can also lead to cravings. I don't know about anybody else who's listening, but certainly you know, if I've got a cold or the flu or something like that, I have a huge craving for orange juice that I don't normally have, and I don't normally drink because I prefer to eat whole fruit when I when I can. But my cravings for orange juice, I'm my body's obviously shouting out for vitamin C at that point as part of the immune function, and so nutritional deficiencies can or nutritional needs as well, can also lead to um to craving. So I think when we look at all those things combined, you know, let's accept this as a natural part of life at this stage of life, or any stage of life, but particularly at this stage of life, and then once we've normalized it, we can accept that this can happen, and then we can look at ways that we may be able to manage that over over time. Uh, if it's not something that you want to do, because obviously everybody's journey is their own. Some people might want to just eat their way through menopause on sweets and crisps, and if that's what they decide to do, then I'm not going to tell them not to do because I'm not the food police. I I'd argue that it probably doesn't support uh trying to balance your hormones better, because then as soon as you start eating stuff that is not particularly um what you what you'd want to be eating normally during during this phase of life, then you're probably going to challenge challenge those hormones even further. But obviously, it is a personal personal choice, and so if you do want to um tackle any cravings that you're having, then I guess that is the subject today's podcast. Yeah, how can we how can we go about this once we've actually realized that it is just part of the natural thing?

SPEAKER_01 5:07

Sure. And I I like, I mean, seriously, we need to normalize cravings because it really is a natural part of our human existence. And one of the things that I've found is cravings can be very much a stress response as well. Um, because if you think about it as babies are learning their environment, they put things in their mouths. When animals are stressed, they chew on things or they bite. Um, there is a nerve called the trigeminal nerve that goes behind your jaw and it actually helps to release dopamine when you chew. So the act of chewing oftentimes, I've um one of the coaches I've worked with in the past used to call it nature's valium. So it is not any, it doesn't mean there's something wrong with you when you feel like you really need to give in to those cravings because that is a natural physiological response in many cases. But the great thing is that we have something that other animals don't, and that is the ability to reason most times. Um, so having a go-to strategy for times when cravings strike is a is a really good way to to conquer them, I think. Um, but uh I think cravings also can be rooted in in many different things. As you said, James, not only nutritional deficiencies, but psychological um attachments. And I think I mentioned in our episode about self-sabotage, you know, when you when you're little and you fall down and scrape your knee and mom gives you a cookie, you pretty soon learn that cookies make you feel better, or whatever the treat was. And so in many cases, it's when we crave something, it's because there's something going on. We may feel stressed, we may feel lonely, we may feel angry, we may have different responses to different emotions that drive us for that comforting that we get from one of those one of those foods. I've never heard of anybody, well, I tend to crave salad because it's one of my favorite things to eat, but I'm very weird. I've never heard anybody tell me, I've got such a craving for broccoli. If I don't get some pretty soon, something bad's gonna happen, right? Um, we usually tend to crave those things that our bodies that don't serve our bodies quite as well. But but I think starting to become aware of when those cravings strike, what's going on, what happened maybe immediately before the craving hit, or a few hours before the craving hit that might have built up to that happening. Because a lot of times if we find it's we're feeling lonely or we're feeling sad, maybe there's a different way to address those feelings than diving into a tub of ice cream or a giant chocolate.

SPEAKER_00 7:56

I mean it's it's it's a well-known technique used by health coaches. It's called breaking the chain, trying to look at the behaviors that lead up to something happening and trying to recognize what the links may be. And then can you put a can you put a chink in that link and and break the chain, which uh and then will that actually stop things from happening? Will it make things things better?

SPEAKER_01 8:21

Yeah, and it's it's it's an interesting phenomenon, and I I don't know if other animals, obviously, they can't talk to us, but I don't know if other animals ever get get cravings. But it and something else I will say, and I'm I've I'm not um this is a this is a factor for me, but I've done a lot of reading and research on the food industry, and I also know that many of our convenience foods are designed, not made, but designed in laboratories. So there are a lot of additives to the food that are created and designed specifically to make us crave those specific flavors and textures, so that when we have those moments where we feel like we're craving something, we're craving those things oftentimes because our bodies are used to those specific tastes or textures or those chemicals that they put into those foods. Plus, you're inundated with so many adverts all day long from everywhere, whether it's the internet or your mobile phone, your games, your billboards, magazines, television, every every media you consume is is bombarding you with a lot of those advertisements that that also feed into your into your subconscious mind and say you you must have this. And and a lot of times they attach it to these amazing pictures of happy, happy people with these beautiful lives. And it's like, yeah, I want that. So maybe if I eat that food, that's what I'm gonna get out of it.

SPEAKER_00 9:57

Yeah, and I I think you know, you're absolutely right. The way that the food industry has changed over the last 10, 20, 30, 40 years is it's huge. But we also live now in a culture of abundance where things are readily available to us at all times, at all seasons, and evolution from an evolution point of view, we didn't grow up like that. You know, we spent thousands and thousands of years evolving as a species to have sweet stuff occasionally as a treat because it only came around once a year during very, very specific months. You know, if there were no berries on the trees from August until the next June or July or whatever it may be, you weren't importing them from somewhere that was warmer. There was nobody bringing across a plane full of blueberries from Kenya or something like that, and so you know, we suddenly went to this, particularly the post-war years, um, where there may be some you know latent guilt or something going on there with the way that we families suffered during the war and and a lack of things, things were taken away from them, and then suddenly post-World War II, you know, you've got this massive abundance of food, um, air traffic's opened up, things can be flown around the world at different times, and people are richer as a whole as well. People have more money as a whole. I'm not saying there aren't still poor people in society, obviously, but when things are there for you as a matter of course, and you can eat them as a matter of course, then you quite often you know the those evolutionary triggers of wanting something sweet are almost triggered all the time, and because they are there all the time, and because we can fulfil them all the time, throw in the fact that there's a food industry that actually wants to manufacture foods to make us crave them, and you've got a real sort of like downward spiral there of people getting into the state where where they almost can't can't beat the cravings. I suppose that's a good point to lead on to. You know, if you are if you are having cravings, what can you do? I mean, I know that you say a lot, Julie, that food only has the power that we give it. So, what tips do you have for our listeners on how they might be able to take some of that power back?

SPEAKER_01 12:23

Sure. Um, one of the things I find is helpful is sitting with the feelings. If you notice a craving, um sit with it for a moment, think about where it's coming from. One of the one of the tools that we like to use is is a body scan. Spend one minute or two minutes just sitting quietly, breathing deeply, and scan your body from head to toe. Where do you where are you feeling tension? Where are you feeling emotion? And then there are there are different hungers, right? So there's emotional hunger and and physical hunger, and um, there's water hunger because we used to eat foods that were far more abundant in water content than than what we typically eat now. So a lot of times we mistake hunger for thirst because of that. Um, but but being able to tune into your body and and ask it what it wants, which sounds a little bit woo-woo, but it really will tell you, do I really want this right now? What am I feeling? Um, I think that's a great way to interrupt that emotional cycle. That even better is to plan ahead. If you have healthy food in your house and you have healthy snacks prepared, you're much more likely to go to those because they're easy. They're easy to get to. So make it easy to eat the healthy options and make it more challenging to eat the less healthy options when you have those cravings. And I think that's that's a good first place to start.

SPEAKER_00 13:58

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 13:59

One of those two things.

SPEAKER_00 14:00

So we've kind of got almost a stop count to 10-ish and let yourself have a little bit of time to sit with it and see if it is something that you really want, and then also to actually spend some time maybe on wheel meal prep and things like that to help um have something that's ready there as well. One of the things that I've used quite a few times with some of my one-to-one clients is to actually just change the setups, change the environment as much as anything. I had one lady who um she worked in office culture. The culture in the office was always three o'clock, tea and biscuits. Uh, the snack drawer with the biscuits in was always right by her desk. So it was easy for her to lean down and open the snack drawer, we get the snacks out and start the party going. You know, we moved the snack drawer over to the other side of the office and put a fruit bowl between her and the snack drawer. And more often than not, she started getting up and having a piece of fruit at three o'clock rather than going over to the snack drawer. So just I think making those environmental changes as well can also help give you that short period of time to just reflect on whether it is something that you that you really want to do.

SPEAKER_01 15:13

Sure. And a lot of times we reach for something at a time of day out of habit. We think it's a we think it's a craving, but really it's it's just something like the tea and biscuits that's that's become a part of our daily routine. So getting away from that can be an interesting challenge. Um, but again, leaning into that from a place of curiosity, something I used to do because I I had times of my life where I love black licorice and I used to crave black licorice. I don't know why, but some days it was like I need black licorice right now. So every time I had that craving, I'd start out by going to brush my teeth. And in my office, I kept a toothbrush and toothpaste in my desk drawer. And so I promised myself that I would brush my teeth first, and then if I still wanted to eat it, I would eat it. But usually after my teeth are brushed, not only does the licorice taste awful, but I don't want to my mouth feels nice and clean, and I don't want to destroy that, so I didn't eat the licorice. And it didn't take very many days for me to just stop eating it.

SPEAKER_00 16:26

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 16:27

So again, interrupting the pattern.

SPEAKER_00 16:29

Yeah, breaking chain interrupting the pattern. It's a really good idea. Another thing that strikes me is that women during the menopause transition, or many women during the menopause transition, tell me that they struggle with their with their weights somewhat. And because they've been there's a conditioning that again comes from the diet industry and the food industry, that calorie restriction is a great idea in an effort to try and lose weight. And we know that you know calories in versus calories out is part of the equation of weight loss, but it's not the whole equation of weight loss because so many of the things feed into it. The one thing that I do know is that when you reduce calories on a constant basis, there's one thing that it absolutely does, and it makes you more hungry, right? And so what I've noticed a lot in in our clients is that there's a calorie restriction, particularly during the morning time. It comes to the to the afternoon, and they're so hungry that the the immediate snack is often the thing that that that's grabbed. So it's not almost even a craving, it's just a satisfying hunger that comes from from not having enough calories during the rest of the day. And we know that uh eating properly in balanced meals, eating three meals a day, making sure that you're eating enough for your body weight and your size and and for your for your age is a really, really important way of measure of managing hunger and and cravings. And therefore, you know, I would also advocate not starving yourself because as soon as you starve yourself, you're gonna want to have more food, right?

SPEAKER_01 18:21

Yeah, it's a surefire recipe for for failure. And and I there there's another thing too, you know, we've got this emotional part of our brain, and then we've got the logical part of our brain, but the emotional part of our brain is the primal brain, and that's what drives us more often. We can't outlogic our emotions. So wherever we're going, you know, it's been likened to an elephant and a rider. So the elephant would be the emotional brain and the rider would be the logical brain. And the logical brain, the rider, can guide the elephant and teach the elephant. But if the elephant gets spooked or scared or something changes in the environment of the elephant, the elephant the rider isn't going to be able to overpower the elephant, right? The elephant is always going to win. So one of the things I would also say is once in a while, give yourself permission. We make these things forbidden. And we talk of we talked about that again in the last episode about that inner two-year-old, that forbidden thing is the thing that you want the most. And if you tell yourself, I can't have that, that's the first thing you're going to want to have. Um, and I speak from experience there as well. So once in a while, it's okay to say, you know what, I I choose to have this, or I choose not to have this, and that gives you the control and the decision-making power. And if you choose to have it, sit down and eat it slowly and mindfully and enjoy every single bite. And then when you're done, put it away and move along. No guilt, no, no worries, because once in a while you're just gonna eat the damn cookie.

SPEAKER_00 20:02

Yeah, and again, I think that's a great technique. You know, I I grew up in a house whereby, well, I I think I explained in episode one, I was born in a pub, and so with my mum and dad, because we're both busy, they're working in the pub all the time. Whenever my sister or I wanted something to eat or a snack, it was just oh, just grab a bag of uh chips or crisps and some pop from behind the bar and sort yourselves out. And obviously, that leads to learned behaviours over the years, doesn't it? And both my sister and I, both salty snacks and and sweets, chocolate, things like that are high on our on our agenda. So I often will sit with like a a bar of dark chocolate, and whereas in the past I would have eaten the whole thing. Just having one or two squares, but letting it melt in your mouth slowly can go a whole way towards reducing the the cravings, but also the guilt that comes with it, because we do convince ourselves that we shouldn't be doing this kind of thing, right? And so, you know, yeah, quite often when people have cravings, they'll go over to the to the cookie jar or the or the snack drawer or whatever it may be and grab something and almost eat it in secret, squirreled away when uh you know in a way, shameful way, when really you're like chocolate's a nice thing. Enjoy your piece or two of chocolate, you know. You get the really dark stuff and it's got some antioxidants in there and some good fats as well. So, you know, so quite often we convince ourselves that these foods are are in inverted commas bad, and then because we consider that they're bad, we consider ourselves bad people for eating them, and therefore, that is where this idea of both the cravings kick in, but also eating things shamefully and not enjoying something that at the end of the day is quite nice.

SPEAKER_01 21:58

Yeah, and the other thing I would say. Is don't don't shop for your health at the dollar store or the pound store. If you're going to have those kinds of snacks, um and allow yourself the best you can afford. Get really good quality so that you can truly enjoy it. And there may be some additional nutritional benefits, like the dark chocolate. So whether whether it's chocolate or handmade um crackers or I don't know, artisanal made cheeses or whatever it is that that you do crave, um, don't keep a bounty of it on hand, but keep the good stuff so that when you do want it, you're enjoying it and you can enjoy every mouthful. I remember there was a there was a lady in my coaching group that um that used to crave wheat thins and she would eat a box of wheat thins every day. And when we challenged her to sit down and eat them slowly and mindfully, she came back and said, I realized something. Wheat thins taste like shit. That was that was the eye-opener because a lot of times when we're craving something and we're just we just shovel it in or shove it in our in our face, and and we don't even really taste it because again, we're we're stuffing down some emotions or we're doing we're we're trying to solve some other problem with the things that we're craving. And um so pay attention to what it is that you're craving, pay attention to how it tastes, you know, is it attached to a memory from childhood? Is it attached to some emotional experience? How where does that come from? Because that can go a long way to to helping you not only become aware of the cravings, but also to to be able to overcome them.

unknown 23:44

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 23:46

So, as is the nature of any conversation, yeah, we've dotted around a little bit from from one area of cravings to another. But um, I I guess kind of trying to recap some of those tips, then. So place some value on meal planning and preparing some healthy snacks would be strategy number one. Well, I suppose strategy number one is accepting that cravings are part of life in general, but maybe enhanced at this time of life due to hormonal changes. Then the importance of meal planning and having healthy snacks, trying to sit with some of that discomfort a little bit is another thing that we talked about. So just trying to see if you can't wait it out and increase your resilience a little bit. Um I think we talked a little bit about distraction techniques as well. Maybe try and do something else to take your mind off it for a little bit, and really at the end of the day, if you actually oh, the other one as well was make sure you eat enough calories, so make sure that you're actually not just craving things because you're hungry.

SPEAKER_01 24:50

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 24:51

And then I suppose environmental changes could be another thing as well, as well as viewing the overall situation that you might be in if cravings come at particular times, and maybe trying to keep some kind of diary and looking at what they what that pathway may be that leads to the craving coming, and can we can we put something in there that will change that the the direction of that a little bit? Is there anything that I forgot there? I think that's most of it.

SPEAKER_01 25:22

I don't think so. I think that I think that lays a really good foundation for for conquering those cravings and and normalizing the cravings. And again, if you choose to allow yourself to have whatever it is that you're craving, enjoy it, enjoy it wholeheartedly, enjoy it slowly and mindfully and guilt-free. And that may take some practice, I understand, but it is possible.

SPEAKER_00 25:50

Yeah, I know some coaches advocate um planned indulgences as well, whereby they allow themselves to or they they speak to their clients about the possibility of only having things on certain days. I'm not a massive fan of that personally. I find as though it's it it starts to embed that idea of rewarding somebody for being an inverted commas good, in my eyes, you know. That you know, I've I've done six days without a piece of chocolate, so on Saturday I'm gonna have a full bar because it's my my my planned indulgence. So you so you're almost reinforcing that idea, then I think, of rewarding yourself for what you're almost telling yourself is a period of austerity where you're not allowed to have the nice stuff, and then on day seven, you know, miraculously chocolate reappears in the house, and and we're allowed to have it again. So I'm I'm not a big fan of that, but I know that it does work for some people.

SPEAKER_01 26:50

Yeah, for some people, if if you can, if you can, because uh for me it's it's all a lot about your relationship with food. And if you have a difficult relationship with food already, then as you said, James, the the planned indulgences or the the special treats um become part of that relationship. They don't help to heal that relationship because it's it's normal. We're human beings, it's normal to want to eat, it's okay to have those cravings, but again, just understanding where they come from and employing one of the strategies that we've shared, I think will will help you a long way to uh to figuring them out and and learning to manage them. So I think that's probably a wrap today, unless you have uh anything else to add.

SPEAKER_00 27:41

Well, the only thing that I'd add is not necessarily about cravings. We're on episode four now. Um, and so far we've set the tone for for the content of each of these podcasts. And what I would do is invite any of the listeners who maybe have some questions that they want to ask us, or maybe want us to discuss a particular thing that they may be challenged by. We're happy to do that as well. So if that is the case, we'll pop our email addresses in the show notes. But it's Julie at fabulousbeyond40.com and James at fabulousbeyond40.com. So pop us an email over and tell us what you'd like us to talk about on uh on this. We've we've got great ideas and great plans, but obviously we want this to work for you as well as for us. So by all means, jump in and help us steer it.

SPEAKER_01 28:30

Yes, yeah. Please please do let us know. We'd love your feedback, we'd love your comments, and don't forget to like and subscribe and share because we're all about you know, sharing is caring, and we we would love to get the word out and uh reach more people so we can help them as well. So I think that's us all for today. Thank you for listening in. We will see you in episode five. And uh this is James and Julie reminding you to be fabulous, be on 40.